In the final scene of the movie One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, the Chief says to the recently lobotomized McMurphy, "I'm going to take you with me." Then, he leans over and suffocates him with a pillow. He dramatically breaks a window and runs far, far, far away. He is presumably free.

It's funny to watch anew the movies I enjoyed as a teenager and young adult. I actually chose this movie to watch with Dave and our teenaged boys. (Ouch! The language! Ouch! The racy scenes. Ouch!) I had imagined that we would talk about mental illness, the abuse of power, and who decides who is actually crazy, anyway? The story, if you don't know it, is about a criminal who is sent to a mental institution for evaluation. He thinks he is getting a literal "Get out of Jail Free Card" like in Monopoly. He'll ride out his 90 days and then get back to his petty crimes. However, his free-spirited disobedience gets under the skin of Nurse Rachett and the administration, and he is disciplined --shock treatments, brain surgery-- to the point of death.


We didn't talk much about all that, however. Our discussion focused on that last scene. Not the surprise death, but the line, "I'm going to take you with me." I asked the boys, "How is it that he is going to take McMurphy with him if McMurphy is dead?" One simply responded, "He will carry him in his heart."

I've been thinking about that line ever since. I've lost some dear ones, yet they are not really lost to me. Like the Chief, I take them with me. I carry them in my heart.

Mark, I carry you in my heart. You taught me that a smile is a free gift to share liberally. I think of you when I smile.

Lisa, I carry you in my heart. You showed me grace under pressure. You didn't complain even when you were in pain and tired of your long battle. I think of you, and try not to complain.

Adam, I carry you in my heart. You were fully man, fully child, and we loved having you around. I think of you when I serve others as you did.

Lewis, I carry you in my heart. You showed me that blood is thicker than water. You loved the Byrd name and our Byrd children. I think of you and I'm proud to be a Byrd.

Dad, I carry you in my heart. You taught me responsibility, perseverance, and listening skills. I think of you and I'm proud to be a Smith.

Last week we were devastated when Hannah George and her father, Dr. Jeff George, were killed in a terrible car accident. Hannah was a 9th grader at Faith Christian School. Our family and our Faith community have been reeling from this loss which to our human eyes seems senseless and unfair. Yet a glimmer of hope came through as we talked about Hannah with the boys.

You see, one of them said, "I'm going to carry her in my heart."

Dedicated to Hannah and Jeff George, with deep sympathy and prayers to Teresa George, wife and mom.