Facebook is a scary place. It's like a continuous Class Reunion. Except its one where you show up as you really are, having forgotten to lose weight, color your hair or bleach your teeth. You splay yourself out on Facebook, thinking most of the time of your local friends or family that you are communicating with when WHAM! you Facebook intersect with long-lost friends who now have access to your family photo albums, including the awful pictures that other people post and tag. (Quit doing that! I hate that!) Anyway, having just Facebook Reunioned with several old and dear friends, it inspired me to post this Oldie and Goodie. It's about the me I used to be...an annoying me that many will remember quite well. This column was the first thing I had professionally published and it's still one of my favorites. It's my heart.

I’m scared of people who know it all. I know a few of them. I recognize the species. Because, well, I used to be one.

I knew it all. At least, I thought I did. When I was younger, hoooo baby, you could not tell me anything. I knew it all. I look back now and blush. If I had addresses, I’d send out lots of sympathy cards. I’d write to everyone who used to work with me, for one. I’d say….

“Sorry you had to work with me in the 80’s. I know I was really obnoxious. Thanks for not throwing me out the window of our high story office building. Blessings! Martie”

I bet some people are still mad. Like one lady chased me into the bathroom once and yelled at me through the stall. She told me I was young and I didn’t know what I was saying. I sat on the toilet and thought about how wrong she was. Sorry, Kate. To Kate, I should send flowers.

My gosh, the moral fiber I imagined that I had! The stand that I took on so many issues! Ok, it’s a tiny bit cute now, to remember how very brilliant I felt when I argued with adults. I felt powerful! I felt right! I could not be dissuaded! On the other hand, now that I have teenagers and have those arguments in reverse, it’s not all that cute. It’s annoying.

When did I figure out that I didn’t know it all? I guess it started when I met the Lord. See, the very first thing I learned about God was this.

“He removes our past transgressions as far as the East is from the West.” (Ps. 103:12, paraphrase mine)

This was both reassuring and humiliating. It was reassuring because I was dragging a lot of baggage around with me. I wasn’t quite sure how I’d ever be free of it. It was great to know that it could be sent through some heavenly FedEx to the other end of the earth. It was humiliating because if God was going to perform that service for me, gosh, it meant He knew what all the transgressions were. He knew it all. It wasn’t me who knew it all, it was God. Gosh, that was painful….but freeing at the same time.

Well, the more I grow in the Lord, the more I realize that I don’t know it all. I hardly know anything.

But I’m psyched because God really does know everything. And He still loves us. He knows what happened in the past. He knows what will happen in the future. He even knows every word we’re going to say, before we say it.

(When I found that Scripture, I was fascinated! Every word? Before we say it??? To test this out, I shouted out a swear word, a really bad one, really fast. And I felt the Lord kind of smirking, with a knowing grin on His face. “I knew you were going to say that,” He said.)

You can’t get away from the Lord. And that’s a great thing.

So now I know that I don’t know much. And I’m pretty relaxed about it. See, the view is nicer from the “Don’t Know It All” side of the fence. You don’t have to always be arguing. You don’t have to think how stupid everyone else is all the time. You can just hang out, and love people.

So now when I meet a Know-It-All, I just smile. And throw up a silent prayer that the Lord will grab hold of them, and save them from themselves, like He did with me. I’m really grateful. I don’t know much…but I do know Him. Turns out, that’s All.